In all seriousness

Why are there locks on 24 hour convenience store door?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

Why is the word abbreviation so long?

Why do they call it a TV "set" when you only have one?

Why are there Braille signs on drive-up ATM's?

What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, its called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

It doesn't matter what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

If a firefighter fights fires, a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?

If con is opposite of pro, is Congress opposite of Progress?

Why are there flotation devices under the seat of planes instead of parachutes?

Why are they called apartments when they're all stuck together?

Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?

Why do they report power outages on TV?

What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant?

If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?

Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why is the word dictionary in the dictionary?

Why are they called buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Why do we chop a tree DOWN and then chop it UP?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

What are those little things on the end of your shoelaces called?

Why can't we sneeze with our eyes open?

Why does breaking a mirror mean seven years of bad luck when seven is a lucky number??

Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo?

Why is there not a Channel 1 on TV?

How can someone be dirt poor, and another be filthy rich?

If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit?

If your plan is having no plan, do you have a plan?

If anything's possible, then is it possible that nothing's possible?

Why do people say heads up when you should duck?